ghoti_mhic_uait: (As if you'd never gone away)
ghoti_mhic_uait ([personal profile] ghoti_mhic_uait) wrote2006-03-02 12:46 pm
Entry tags:

Past performance is no guarantee of future performance.

It's not snowing. Does the weather no longer care about Chris?

Five years on, and the sun is shining, it's like another early spring day. Where is the snow?

I still can feel his touch, I still remember. I am not likely to forget.

I remember the sound of his voice, and the feel of him. I remember the way he looked, bending over me.

I will not forget. I love(d) him, and he loved me, and I will not forget.

There are times when I cry, the last time I heard In Paradisium I had to hold my breath to stop from crying (because he wanted me to sing it on his grave, but he is not there, he is not there. I sang it on the bridge, and passers by stared at me, singing and weeping, but it had to be done, because I promised.)

I hear the piano played, echoes of him - he'd always play the piano instead of breakfast, he'd put it like that. "Do you want some breakfast, Chris?" "Yeah sure" "What will you have?" "I'll just play the piano"

The words, his phrases, come back to me in tumbling laughing whirls of tears.

I miss him, but I will not forget.

He was beautiful.

[identity profile] xanna.livejournal.com 2006-03-02 01:07 pm (UTC)(link)
*wordless embrace*
emperor: (Default)

[personal profile] emperor 2006-03-02 01:07 pm (UTC)(link)
It still feels strange - can it really be five years?

*hugs*

[identity profile] fluffyarmadillo.livejournal.com 2006-03-02 01:09 pm (UTC)(link)
Sometimes they can be painful but memories are sometimes all we have left to hold onto. *hugs tight*

[identity profile] duranorak.livejournal.com 2006-03-02 01:15 pm (UTC)(link)
I love you. I don't forget, either, though I never knew him I'll never forget what happened to me in 2004. Never.

E.
x

[identity profile] absinthecity.livejournal.com 2006-03-02 01:29 pm (UTC)(link)
*big hugs*

It started snowing here as soon as I read this. And it still is, lots.
gerald_duck: (lemonjelly)

[personal profile] gerald_duck 2006-03-02 02:07 pm (UTC)(link)
I knew Chris as a good friend, not as a lover. Still, I miss him terribly.

)-8

[identity profile] hddod.livejournal.com 2006-03-02 02:34 pm (UTC)(link)
:(

*hugs*

[identity profile] rathenar.livejournal.com 2006-03-02 02:40 pm (UTC)(link)
It just snowed here...

I'll always remember him asleep with his head in my lap, too tired to stay awake but with nowhere to go. Oliver and I still have a couple of his books that he prized so highly he didn't want them in danger while he slept rough - he said "take care of these, I'll come back for them sometime".

I'm still half waiting for him to.

[identity profile] rysmiel.livejournal.com 2006-03-02 02:59 pm (UTC)(link)
This is beautiful.

*hug*

[identity profile] badriya.livejournal.com 2006-03-03 03:53 pm (UTC)(link)
I don't know about Chris, but the writing made me sad. It was beautiful though. xx